fedification.com

Muu Manow

Bangkok, Thailand – Today I finally head to Issan, Thailand’s northeast. More on the crazy muu manow above later.

When I ordered my lunch, which I did by pointing at someone’s else lunch, the young Thai girl behind the Thai coffee stand started giggling.  I wasn’t totally sure why until I got what I ordered.  It was a pork salad, dressed with herbs, spices and dressed with lime juice, but unlike other pork salads I’d had, the meat in this one was raw.  I was something of a special guest at this outdoor street stall.  The middle aged Thai guys smiled and offered me cigarettes.  The designated English speaker asked me if I wanted something to drink and when I responded water in Thai the entire place burst out in approving chuckles. 

Once the plate of raw pork was set in front of me, I made some quick politeness calculations. I decided that eating 3/4 of the plate would look like I ate most of it.  So, I set to work bringing up the spoonfuls of raw muu manow to my mouth.  My throat clenched in fear and had to choke down each bite, eating longbeans, raw cabbage, dill and sticky rice in between as if they might form some protective shield in my stomach.  I was too scared to actually be able to taste anything; I just pressed towards my goal of 3/4 of the plate.

As I munched away, the owner of the joint came to chat with me in broken English.  He took a look at my book and I explained to him that I was from the US and would be traveling to Issan the next day.  He turned to the table of middle-aged Thai men and I heard bits of the conversation. “America…Phimai, Nong Khai, Tha Bo,  Chiang Khan…,” he said explaining my origin and travel itinerary.  Everyone nodded approval.  I forced down another bite of the raw muu manow.

One of my friends who’s something of a marathon junkie says that when you’re running a marathon you become aware of your entire body.  Well I’ve never run a marathon, but I can tell you that when you eat a raw pork salad from a street cart in Bangkok you become more aware of your body.  I’m not hungry.  Could it be methicillin resistant staphylococcus aureus?  I’m feeling fatigued.  Is that a sympton of streptococcus suis?  My left elbow itches.  I think I read somewhere that trichinosis makes your elbows itch.

This is the mind of a neurotic at work, not a neurotic who would decline to eat raw pork, nor one who would make a quick trip to the hospital to get an antibiotic shot before taking a trip.  No, this is the type of neurotic who tells herself that the statistical chance of getting a nasty foodborne illness is low and yet lives in a state of fear – a neurotic in denial.  In any case, this neurotic will be careful not to order another plate of raw swine and is crossing her fingers about the whole streptococcus suis thing.